Monday, December 27, 2010

To end the year off...

Its been to long...

This post is to bring the year to an end.  This past year has been quit the trip.  From the negatives to the positives.  I would describe this year like a phoenix gone mad to a phoenix of hope.  

The beauty of Phoenixes is the idea of burning to ash and then being reborn through it.  It may seem like all is wiped clean, but that is not true... the phoenix holds all feelings and memories from it's past life.  This is true about all relationships that have been through hell and is in the process of healing.  I have never shared my entire life with anyone yet.  Of course those that have lived it with me know those parts.  I have hidden a lot about me for the past 20 years of my life.  

This new year, I would like to share more of who Tania is... Where she comes from... How she grew up... with who she grew up with... her home (Hawaii)... and her experiences.  These have been hidden well and for good reason.  With trust,  I have learned, there is pain and fear.  Two things that I have built thick walls around me to prevent from entering into me.  Two things that can help me be more free.  

This year pain and fear is what I invite.